Inklings 2025

The GRWM Queen Austin Aagaard ’26 Good morning, my loves! It’s me, your girl, Queen of Sass, Reporting live from my bathroom of marble and glass. Today, I’ll show you my routine so divine— Grab your matcha; we’re all about to shine. First step: I cleanse my face with tears of a dove— Only $800, but worth it, my love. Then I slap on this mask made of snail goo— The snails are free-range; that’s why it’s worth two (million). Let’s talk life, babes. Last night was wild. A psychic told me I’m her fave feral child. She said, “Babe, you’re a vibe, you’re a mood— But stop manifesting fights with that ugly dude.” Oh, and drama: Stacey’s STILL using drugstore blush. Like, girl, we love you, but are you in a rush? I only use this one by Saint de Glare— It’s made from rose petals and air. Anyway, life’s been hard lately, no lie— My latte came with REGULAR milk—like, why? The barista said, “Sorry,” but I said, “It’s not fine. Just wait—you’ll be hearing from my fans online.” Quick Q&A! Y’all asked, “Miss Sass, what’s your deal? 5