Inklings 2020

DANCE COMPETITION Becca Fisher 322, 322, 322, … The only way to keep track of an audition number is to repeat it over and over in my head. 322, 322, 322, … Only two elite dancer title winners remain. Planted on the stage, I hold my breath for fear of ruining the chances of my number being called. “336! And finally…” In anticipation of being left on that stage yet again with a “nice try” and a pity-fueled pat on the back, tears blur my vision. I have worked too hard, too long, too... After every competition, my dance teacher, Angel, says, “A title doesn’t define who you are as a dancer and artist.” My infatuation with dance is as old as I am; Fisher family legend has it that I was potty-trained in a week because “ballerinas don’t wear diapers.” I can picture that small me: round, green eyes watching her patent leather Mary Janes make music on the white of the kitchen tile. I often look down at my hundred-dollar Bloch tap shoes and think of all the pairs I’ve had between the ages of 3 and 17. Only the two most recent pairs have danced me down the red carpet; the others, taps shimmering in the stage lights, impatiently waited their turn to no avail. With shoes laced tightly on feet that had also trained in pointe shoes, ballroom heels, and ballet slippers, I danced any and every style. However, I watched from the wings as everyone around me celebrated victories. Fourteen years of ever-so-close. All in all, I do consider myself a winner. Winning is not getting straight As, and it’s not being named an Elite Dancer at West Coast Dance Explosion. It’s most certainly not being perfect. I think I can mathematically lose and still consider it a win. I dance with girls whose lives are only committed to earning title after title. I respect that, but I prefer to be the teammate everyone goes to for help with their homework. Nevertheless, most days, there’s no place I’d rather be than in the studio being yelled at for bent knees and told to “run it again from the top.” “Our last elite dancer is number 322! And that concludes the Senior category title winners. Congratulations, and thank you for a great weekend.”